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Therapist: Tell me more about this “perfect happiness” you experienced during those days following his so-called “proposal”…

Me: Do you know how it feels when you’re drunk? Or drugged?

T.: Unfortunately, i do know…

Me: Well…i don’t, i never got drunk and i never used any drugs…but i imagine is like floating over your own life…Am i wrong?

T.(laughing): I wont answer to this question…So, you felt like floating? Or flying…or were you in a free fall without even knowing…

“Her heart was racing and she closed her eyes, completely drowned into the song. The sweet voices from the choir behind her and Daniele playing piano…all those rehearsals, the anxiety, the prayers…And now she was in front of everybody, singing Ave Maria like she never sang before…putting all her heart and soul in the song, reaching for the highest notes without any effort…like all of her faith and hope were concentrated in her voice.

For the first time in months she felt like she didn’t had any burden at all. Like a feather, embraced by light and joy, like having wings. She opened her eyes and listened to the last note from Daniele’s piano. He was smiling at her and she knew it was perfect. The church was filled with people and when she gracefully bowed she saw someone…a nice lady with tears in her eyes. And seeing this reaction made her feel like being touched by an Angel.

Another round of applause and Daniele took her hand and they left together the stage.

-Dio mio! Sunshine, you were perfect! Come here and give me the biggest hug! I can’t believe it! See? If you just concentrate a little…Thanks God you reached that tone without forcing your voice, like you did at the rehearsals…

He took her in his arms and kissed her on the cheek.

-That’s for all the late hours spend with rehearsals…for not eating ice cream for almost a month…for putting up with my criticism and for your patience…

She took something out of her bag.

-I know it’s not much…it’s for being my best friend even when i’m difficult…for listening and carrying…for protecting all my secrets and for providing me an alibi every time…

He looked amazed at the small piece of jewelry.

-It’s beautiful…a blue Divine Mercy necklace shaped like a star…Oh, Sunshine, i’ll keep it next to my heart…forever…Now i don’t know if i deserve it…we disagree about Alessio…OK, i admit…i misjudged the guy…If he makes you happy…But, Sunshine, marrying at 18 is crazy…By the way, i saw him in public…

Someone interrupted them.

-Carissa, Daniele…congratulation for a beautiful and inspired version of Ave Maria! I could feel The Holy Spirit there…and Carissa…your voice sounded heavenly…

She blushed. It was unusual to her to receive these kind of compliments and she didn’t knew what to say.

-Carissa…i don’t know if you heard about Signora Moretti. She and her husband are the main contributors at the reconstruction of our beloved church…A beautiful family, living a life according to the teachings of our Holy Catholic Church…Well, Signora Moretti was so impressed by you…she wanna meet you. It’s very important that you make a good impression…you’re not only representing yourself, you’re also representing the school and our values.

She wanted to protest, to say that it was also Daniele’s effort, but she didn’t had the chance. She walked to the small passage and felt the smell of an expensive perfume. In front of her was the nice lady that cried during her singing. She was around 50, elegant and beautiful, with a posture reminding her of the high society. But her smile was so sweet and gentle, and the warmth of her voice…

-You must be Carissa! So nice to meet you. I’m Luisa Moretti and this is my husband, Mario. Please call us by our first name…

-Nice to meet you too, Signora…i mean Luisa. I saw you in the church so many times with Signor…i mean with Mario…

Luisa smiled revealing a perfect set of white teeth. She had a melancholic air that only gave her more class…

-Cari…can i call you Cari? We heard you singing and we felt like being in the presence of an Angel. I know all about you from Padre Antonio…please, don’t get us wrong…but we were so impressed by your story and now…i look at you and i see myself…more than 30 years ago and i just…

Her husband interrupted her.

-What my wife wanna say is that…we would be honored if you’d accept our invitation to dinner next Saturday. We wanna help you in any way we can…Only if you want to, of course.

-I…i don’t know what to say…

Signora Moretti looked in her eyes with so much appreciation and warmth, opening her arms to embrace her.

-So it’s settled…Figlia mia…grazie, i can’t wait for Saturday…i wanna know all about you, i already think you’re the bravest girl i ever known. It’s rare…and very precious to find someone so young and talented…Please, don’t consider us rude…it’s something unusual to us too…but when i saw you i just felt like you’re the daughter i never had…

They left and she remained with so many questions. Who are these people and why are they interested on knowing her? Why were they so friendly…her father always told her never to trust strangers…And still…the nice lady called her “figlia mia”, my daughter…Should she trust them? But they knew Padre Antonio and they are supporting the church, so they cannot be that bad…

So many thoughts and only one feeling. A warm and loving feeling. Signora Moretti, Luisa…the way she pronounced the words when she called her “my daughter”…If once…only once…her own mother could be like that…She took the teddy bear out of her school bag.

Missing terribly her family…

Missing those loving words, those loving arms, the warmth in her mother’s voice…missing feelings and sensations she never experienced before.”

Therapist: The family you never had…good, honest, loving people. Were they real? Not the people…their intentions? 

Me: They were searching for something…they saw in me the lonely child needing protection and love…i saw in them the perfect family…

T.: You had something they needed…The Trust…A child who’ll look up to them, a child who’ll admire and respect them, who’ll trust them…like their own child never did…You gave them an illusion, Cari…and sometimes people are willing to do anything to keep that illusion…

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