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“Your eyes are slowly closing…with every breath…breath in only peace and self-control…let it all out…very good…the anger, the pain…breath them out…It’s alright…your body feels lighter and you feel carried away to the steps…one…you’re starting to count…your rational mind is counting, explaining, reasoning…while your emotional side is going deeper…you’re at the fifth step…now a part of you is drowned by the amazing trip you’re gonna start…with every breath you continue to let the tension out of your body…seven, eight…nine…you’re completely safe…keep going…going down this corridor…ten…you’re there…open the door and tell me where your unconscious mind is leading you…

I’m on my knees…looking at the crucifix, the white one…praying…

Lord…I was so focused on my own life…I didn’t saw the whole picture…I was so drowned by my past…I forgot to look around me, into the present…I was so concentrated on my own world…how could I forget so easily…there’s so much pain…around us…

It’s alright, Cari…you’re in a church…a white, safe place…your safe place…is there anybody else…

Sister Anna is approaching. She’s asking me something…

-Why are you crying, child?

-I came here searching for a little guidance…Sister Anna, I didn’t cared and suddenly there were everywhere…on the news, in the local papers, people were talking…everywhere, Sister…I saw the pain in their eyes and the evil in their killers eyes…

-You saw a small part of this world, child…a place just like so many others…where children are murdered…today this place is Iraq and it’s surroundings…yesterday it was another…tomorrow…

-Sister Ann…why is God allowing these crimes to happen…why is pure evil walking free on the earth…and why can’t anybody stop it…I saw in their eyes, they weren’t terrorists…there was no Light there, only something very dark…Something unstoppable…

Continue breathing deep and slow, letting your tears to fall free…you’re safe…you’re in control of your emotions…it is your choice…to stay there or to keep traveling deep inside your unconscious mind…

 Sister Ann took my hands from my face, looking deep in my eyes.

-What did you felt, child, when you were looking at those picture?

-I felt anger, hate…the need to go there and fight…that’s how I felt…the need to take them all, all those children in my arms and to run far away with them…

-Do you think that anger, hate, fight…all these negative emotions are an expression of your love and faith in God? Do you think they are send from our God…or do they come from another place…

-I don’t know…

-Think about it, child…isn’t it possible that this hate could be exactly the path to darkness? Exactly what Satan wants you to feel…

-It may be…but what’s the solution then? What can I do? Turn the other cheek, pretend it’s not happening? I wont do it, Sister Ann…

-You said you wanna fight. Here’s your weapon.

She gave me the white Rosary. I took it and looked down, knowing that I have my answer now…

-Words of kindness to the wounded ones, prayers for those in danger…and prayers for us all, because we’re all in danger…Doing good without being asked to…

-Sister Ann…is this world going to end? Are we living the apocalypse? It feels so…Tell me, is this the final battle? The one where innocents are becoming martyrs and children are murdered…This must be the final battle…I can’t imagine anything worse…

-The final battle, my child…is carried in every soul in this universe…from the moment we’re born till the moment when we lay our soul to the hands of God…Right in these moment, there are angels and demons fighting for your soul…and the final decision belongs to you. You can save the world…your inner world…and maybe, with one more Light by our side, we’ll never have to look into the darkness again. Now go, child…this world needs our prayers and you have the best weapon in your hands…the only one who can defeat evil. Go and be stronger.

Ten…nine…eight…you’re becoming more aware of the sensations you’re experiencing…seven…your breathing is becoming faster…you feel the need to slowly move your fingers…five, four…your eyes are easier, you feel relaxed, like after a nice nap, three, two…you’re moving your palms…very good…One! Open your eyes, Cari, you’re completely awake.”

-How do you feel, Cari? Would you mind if I’d take notes from what you’re gonna tell me?

-Of course not. It felt very real and, at the same time, like a dream…I heard your voice telling me that I’m safe, but I didn’t felt my body…like I was floating. And when you told me to come back, I almost didn’t wanted to…And my voice sounded different in my ears…

-Tell me, how would you describe the experience in general terms? I wanna know that before analyzing the details.

-It was…healing, liberating, deep and powerful at the same time. It made me feel in control, I know it sounds strange because I was almost asleep. And it gave me some answers…

-You were in complete control of your body and of your emotions. I’m just a guide, the hard work is actually yours. Tell me about your answers.

-All of my life I was desperate to control things…my emotions, my decisions, my future…and -ironic isn’t it?- I surrounded myself with people who wanted nothing but to control me. Today I learned something about myself…and it made me proud…I learned that is alright to just let it go…to just do what you feel, what you need…and that’s the real self control…I also learned that there’s no hope or healing in hate…

This post is dedicated to the victims of the deadly extremist group ravaging Iraq and Syria. No faith, no religion, no law can justify the cruelty against children.

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