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Dave: I wont ask why do you wanna leave. I’m asking you what’s your reason for staying here. Is it love? The family you always wanted and now he’s giving it to you on a silver plate…

Me: I’m staying because this is my home. People say that home is where your heart belongs…well, what if your heart is broken and small pieces were carried by the wind between two continents? What about then?

Dave: Your heart might be split up between two continents, but the guy who can put all the pieces together is not…he has a well defined place in this world…and there is your home.

“-It is not your fault! Cari…look at me, you did nothing wrong! Tell me again, what did they said?

She couldn’t speak, crying so hard that her whole body was shaking. Angelo was holding her, trying to convince her to listen to his reasons.

-They…said…that…he left right after…I spoke to him…and now Police…is searching…but they believe…that…he’s…he’s…suicidal. That’s what they said! I did that to him! I did!

-It’s alright, sweet girl…how were you suppose to know that he was planning to run from the hospital…Give me that note…I wanna read it again.

The piece of paper was moist with her tears and the hand writing was almost unreadable. Wrote by a trembling hand…

Carissa…now I know. She was here with me all the time. I was blinded by my own pain and anger. She was waiting here patiently. I wanna go home, child…they will never let me go home. I wanna be with my love, my one and only love. She’s been waiting for me for too long…I’m going home…HOME, finally!!! She’s holding my hand right now…my beloved Millie…She told me to write to you. She said you’ll cry, but you don’t have to. WE ARE HAPPY! WE ARE IN LOVE! WE ARE TOGETHER! Finally together till the end of time…

Be safe, Carissa! Don’t trust the angel…he’s deceiving! He wont let you find your way home. Your friends, Millie and Silvio

-Ohhh…Angelo, what have I done…how could I be so fool and not predict that he’ll do something like this…

He caressed her hair, gently pulling her closer. She closed her eyes, still sobbing.

-Carissa, about your volunteering at the hospital…

-I know! Everybody is telling me the same! That I shouldn’t do that…I should only focus on my school…they’re all absolutely right about it! I’m gonna quit…

He spoke on a very serious tone.

-Cari, I was about to say something different. I wanted to tell you that, if you wanna do this…if you feel that it’s your destiny to become a doctor…you have my support. With everything you need…but if you’re quitting so easily, there’s no point…

She remained silent for a while.

-Angelo…why are you so good to me? I thought you’re gonna tell me to quit…

-Let’s see…why am I so good to you. Because, sweetheart…cutting your wings, controlling you, forcing you to do things…that’s not in my job’s description. Remember me…your guardian angel?

She smiled…a real smile. She was surprised that she still knows how to smile.

-Thank you…

-And you know something else? I’m good to you because…

-Because you love me.

The words came out of her mouth without control. They sounded cold even to her own ears. She felt her body becoming tense in his arms. An uncontrollably tension…

-Yes, I love you. And each time I say the words, you’re looking at me like I were a criminal. You become like a rock and I can’t touch you anymore. Not your body…no…I’m talking about your heart. Why, Cari? Just tell me why.

She looked down, afraid to even breath. The silence became unbearable. He gently touched her face.

-Do you want me to answer for you? You want me to take a wild guess and to tell you why? Alright…You can’t stand to hear the words because, every time someone tells you “I love you”, is because they want something in return. Isn’t it right? (she nodded) You’re afraid I’m the same. You’re panicking thinking that I want romantic love. No, worse…sex. A relationship. Am I right? (she nodded again) What if I would feel that way? Would you accept? Honestly, Carissa…I think you would. Because…

-…because I don’t have nobody else! That’s why! And I don’t wanna loose you!

The outburst was surprising to her own ears. She felt like blushing from head to toes and she hoped he didn’t noticed. He smiled.

-That’s why, sweetheart, I’m not doing this. I’m not pushing things, I’m not crossing the line. My “I love you” means that you’re precious, you’re beautiful, you’re sweet…and that I’ll keep you safe no matter what. Are we ok now, silly girl?

-Thank you. We are…my guardian angel. I love you too.”

Dave: So…you’re searching for your way home. 

Me: Not anymore, Dave. I am home. And if some day I’ll get lost again, I trust that he’ll take my hand and lead me back where my heart belongs.

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