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Dave: You stayed with him even when you realize that his dark side will drag you into the darkness…

Me: Will you judge me too? People were telling me that I’m weak…I believed in him even in our darkest moments. I wanted to believe. And I felt stronger when we overcame the darkness…Had I created my own illusion? Out of selfishness? Or out of pride? It doesn’t really matter, does it? Deep inside my darkness, feelings have the same color…

 “She look at the skies above. The light was so weak and the clouds were so heavy and dark…six in the morning, a stormy morning after a night of walking, sleeping on a bench in the park, trying to find a way out…

Now it would be a good moment…Yes, I’m talking to you, Father! Don’t hide behind clouds, come down here and give me an answer. Why? And how have I ended alone on the streets? I did nothing wrong…I followed Your rules…OK, You don’t wanna answer…then give me a ray of light, something warm…

The sound of a thunder interrupted her prayer. Cold drops of rain, like tears from the sky…and suddenly the cold became colder…

I said something warm and You’re giving me a cold shower! Father, I think we have a very disturbed communication…Alright, at least let me grab my suitcase…God! My suitcase! My things! They’re all gone…Oh God…it’s too much! Are You playing with my mind? Trying to find out how much can I bare? Well, I can’t anymore…

She realized that she has nothing. The suitcase with her clothes, her passport, her money…her life…someone stole it while she was sleeping on the bench. Nothing left…and the thought was the last drop…she started to walk, a robotic forced marsh trough the rain and the thunders, but her mind was blank…feeling numb, crazy, lost. The cold rain, the strong wind and the darkness all around her…

This must be a nightmare. I will wake up in my bed, back home, in my old room. I’ll squeeze my teddy bear and I’ll dry the pillow, cause is probably moist in tears. Nonnina will come and she’ll bring me cornettos. And hot chocolate. None of this is true, is all just a nightmare…Do You hear me, God? Wake me up immediately! Or…if is not a nightmare…I guess this is hell…God, why am I in hell? Are You even there? If you are, give me a sign…please, God…I wont ask for more…a sign that I wasn’t praying in vain all of my life…

 -Carissa! What are you doing here? Your clothes are wet, you know you’ll catch a cold! Come here, get into the car, I’ll drive you home!

-Home? No…I’m not getting into your car! Not in a million years! Leave me alone!

He stopped the car. She tried not to face him, but running away wasn’t an option…her feet were swollen and every move was painful. He took her hands.

-Your hands are so cold…you need a hot shower and some dry clothes…

-I don’t…leave me alone, take your hands off me…

-Now look…I don’t know what happen to you…but I’m standing in the storm for you, ruining a Calvin Klein tuxedo! For you. So get into that damn car and let me take you home, stupid kid!

She felt her world becoming dark and a rage like never before. She didn’t realized the moment when she started to hit him with her fists…nor the moment when she started to cry out her pain. In tears, in screams, in fights…

-I’m not a stupid kid! I don’t have a home anymore! I’m homeless…do you hear me? I’m homeless, just like any other homeless child I ever helped during my volunteering! I don’t have dry or clean clothes, cause someone stole my suitcase. I don’t even have my documents…passport, papers from school, my diploma…all gone…I’m nothing, I have nothing…God isn’t answering…and you…I hate you…I do…

He grabbed her hands, stopping her from hitting him. She almost collapsed and, with a single move, he opened the door of his car, putting her in. The warmth and the smell of perfume reminded her of another life. She started to cry, covering her face…

-Don’t put your hands on your face, you have dirt all over them…come closer, I’ll give you a tissue…

-Where…where will you take me…

-Home. Your new home. An apartment I kept for renting and it looks like now it found it’s new owner. At least for a while. I’ll lock you in and I’ll go straight to the mall to buy you a new set of clothes. And food, I was unprepared for guests. Don’t worry about the documents, I’ll have my lawyer taking care of everything.

-You always…I hate when you take control like this! You can’t decide over my life…

-But I can help a friend in need, right? I mean…am I allowed to help a friend in need? Or I’m not worthy to offer you my humble house?

-You know what? If you’re gonna be cynical about this…better let me walk away…I’m not in a good mood this morning.

His eyes were like fire piercing trough her soul. The beauty of darkness…

-Listen to me, homeless girl. I am your friend. That’s all I am…not your babysitter, nor your servant. And you know why I’m your friend? Cause I wanna be. Cause we both saw the darkest parts of each other…and I still care for you. Before killing each other again…let’s get you out of this storm. How do you say when someone is helping you? The magic words, princess…

-Thank you. Thank you, Matteo…”

Dave: I don’t think you were selfish or proud…nor coward to stay by his side. By his dark side…You believed in him, you truly did. And you also believed in your marriage. You still believe in it. I remember telling you that Ryan is your obsession. I was wrong. He’s your love…I realized that when I saw the light in your eyes…and in his eyes…you pulled him out of the darkness and that’s something that only love can do…

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